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Comment by Hilton Mayston on October 27, 2011 at 12:54pm

Secondly. thanking Roselle for her update. What do we accept as being just ? How easy is it to turn from disagreement to war. I have recently found the following scale - from desire, to demand, to judgement, to dying for - helpful as a guide. Clearly to war we are deciding that lives are dependent on actions to be taken. The issue of identity also seeks a tension between individuality and community. Is the best place to start a desire for a safe place to express ourselves and to listen to each other ?

Comment by Hilton Mayston on October 27, 2011 at 12:47pm

Firstly, I'd like to thank Skye for prompting me to re-visit Chapter 1(p34) to discover the mention upeksa(even-mindedness). Which when referenced in the index identifies two other mentions p77(ch3)&p146(ch10). On p77 with the addition of non-attachment and on p146 the inclusion of equanimity. The reference on p146 also showing the derivation of upeksha from upa(over) and iksa(to look). Implying a thorough examination rather than that of ignorance. This is then introduced with the word equability. Clearly, how attached we are to our present positions is a good starting point in analysis. How welcome are we to 'strange' ideas and events ?

Comment by Roselle Kovitz on October 20, 2011 at 8:25am

We had a rich discussion on Step 9: Concern for Everybody last night in the discussion group at East West Bookshop in Seattle. One of the questions we mulled over was the concept of a "just war" and how many of our current conflicts would fit a "just war" criteria, whether there is a tribal spirit in any of them and whether military action improves the situation or increases hostility. (p. 147 in Twelve Steps to a Compassionate Life) In light of the news of the death of Muammar Gaddafi this morning, this question is underscored. Any thoughts anyone would like to share here?

Comment by Hilton Mayston on October 13, 2011 at 1:39pm

Thanx Skye I can relate to your feeling of assault from elements beyond your control. Thanx for introducing me to the word equanimity. A quick google gave me

'equanimity as the ability to control your reaction to the external events of your life. The ability to remain calm and emotionally in control, even though the present circumstances may seem to call for a more negatively-charged reaction.'  Is that what you mean ? Are there particular strategies that you'd recommend for this to be done successfully ?

Comment by Skye Burn on October 12, 2011 at 11:00am

Good morning, Perhaps the greatest challenge I experience in practicing compassion is when I feel assaulted--assaulted by global and local news, assaulted by proposed developments that threaten the health and well-being of my community and family, assaulted by my own thoughts and feelings when I am struggling to resolve an issue within myself or with another person. For me, a sense of internal equanimity allows compassion to be present. Skye 

Comment by Hilton Mayston on October 12, 2011 at 10:23am

Thanx Roselle. Yes, listening is a very important to clarify exactly what the reality is. Quaker tradition is good on this. The saying is an adaption from Bernard of Clairvaux(14th Century). No worries over engagement. Hopefully @ some point other members may eventually comment. I must admit I observed for a while before I'd brought my own copy of the book.

Comment by Roselle Kovitz on October 11, 2011 at 5:39pm

Thanks, Hilton. I was fortunate to be able to go through a Restorative Circles workshop here in Seattle. Over and over, I'm reminded of the power of deep listening. I love what you say about meeting a person where they are--dropping expectations. It's so easy to interact with each other based on our own overlay, rather than being open to what is. What an interesting dance we do : ).

 

Thank you for continuing to engage us, Hilton (I missed your note--I don't know why it didn't show up in my e-mail.)

Comment by Hilton Mayston on October 5, 2011 at 2:08pm

http://my.compassionateactionnetwork.com/group/restorative-circles-...

Comment by Hilton Mayston on October 5, 2011 at 2:07pm

Thanx Roselle for your perspective. Maybe from your prompt  of 'What are some of your greatest challenges to practicing compassion?' One of my first reservation @ present is the limiting of compassion to negative needs. I have started looking @ compassion as being a combination of 'company and passion'. Leading to the challenge to accompany a person on their journey and the sharing of their passion(ideas,desires,aspirations)whether positive or negative.. Linked with this I use the phrase 'meet a person where they are not where you expect them to be'. My reservations on the meditation is posted previously, accepting my perspective comes from my cultural background. In terms of practice I am learning to identify healthy boundaries that lead to constructive and peaceful outcomes. Have downloaded the document on restorative justice found under another group on here. Will post the title soon.

Comment by Roselle Kovitz on October 5, 2011 at 10:25am

Hi Hilton: From my vantage point, I've noticed online discussions tend to stop and start depending on the topic and/or "chemistry" in the discussion group.

I've also noticed activity seems to beget activity. So, to others in our discussion, this is a great opportunity to jump in and create some activity. What are some of your greatest challenges to practicing compassion? I'm working on developing empathy for someone who can push my buttons. It's a stop and start proposition, but I've tried to get to know them better and have used the lovingkindness meditation which has helped.

Thank you for continuing to engage and encourage discussion here, Hilton!

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